Visceral Cultural Experience - Grad School

 

 

Lorie Leske

Multiculturalism and Diversity Student

I was both excited and nervous about this visceral cultural experience project for class. I planned out my time to have lunch at the Salvation Army one afternoon. When I was getting ready to leave the comfort of my own home I realized that I would not fit in very well and I didn't want to look like an intruder. All of a sudden I felt self-conscious about my freshly manicured nails, the jewelry I was wearing, my new shoes I had bought to go with my outfit, and my newly cut and colored hairdo. I took off my jewelry, changed my clothing, and donned a ball cap. I was painfully aware that I have benefitted from institutional racism and was feeling some white privilege guilt.

When I looked up the location of the Salvation Army I realized that its location was evidence of structural classism and psychological distancing. It is located on “the other side of the tracks”. It is not on a through street so no one will accidentally or regularly drive by it unless they are looking for it. I wondered if there would be greater community support and compassion if the Salvation Army was on a main road, a busy busline, closer to the “World Famous Mayo Clinic”. Would people take notice of the needs in our community if we didn’t hide it away in a corner?

I parked down the street from the Salvation Army and walked to the community center where lunch was being served. I could tell I was in the right spot as people were milling around, chatting, and grabbing a smoke outside the door. Rain was starting to fall so people were gathered close together under the overhang. Once I entered the building, I could see several people who seemed to work or volunteer there. A black gentleman was greeting people right inside the door. He had several pages of names and some people seemed to be checking in with him. I asked if I needed to check in before I could have food and he asked for my name since it was my first time. He encouraged me to grab some food but to come back if I had any questions. 

In the dining room, I found around 40 or so individuals eating, sleeping, and chatting. There were a variety of races and ethnicities in the dining room. As Heather McGhee pointed out in The Sum of Us, the racism in America negatively affects not just the people of color or marginalized communities but white people are left behind as well.

I went to the window and waited my turn to get a tray of food. I joked around a bit with the man in front of me and I appreciated the smile he offered. Honestly, I felt like I was stealing food. The two people in the window serving food were very kind and asked for my food preferences. I received a chicken alfredo pasta, salad with dressing, a slice of bread, and a pear. For beverages an older lady was serving water or lemonade. I had plenty to eat and got to work cleaning my plate. Most people were sitting by themself or with one other person. I sat near a woman that was looking at her phone. When she looked up, I tried to make a little small talk, but she got up to talk to someone else. A few minutes later, another couple came and joined us at the table. We talked about a cute jacket that the woman was wearing, and a discussion continued about affordable places to get a coat with the winter coming. 

A few people had laid down on benches or the floor to rest. I don't know if that is common, but it was raining outside, and I am sure they appreciated a little sleep in a dry space. As I looked around, I noticed that there were several doors leading off the dining room. One door was labeled Laundry, another read Housing, on the other side there were several rolling racks of bread and rolls. 

I finished my meal and was directed where to clean my tray and turn it in. I felt very humbled by the kindness I received, and I was overwhelmed with compassion. My life has been one of ease compared to the folks I met. I have never gone hungry or suffered any form of food or housing insecurity. We didn't have a lot of money, but Maslow's basic hierarchy of needs was always met. I tried to observe without judgement, the people that received a meal with me. I noticed that several guests had ongoing dental issues that I am sure was painful. Other individuals looked like they didn't have access to regular hygiene facilities or supplies. Some were sitting by themselves but anxiously engaged in conversation with no visible companion. I have had cavities and required tooth extractions. When I had those needs, I went to the dentist. When I struggled with anxiety I went to the doctor and received medication to help and a therapist to talk to. I sometimes shower three times a day if I work out or if it is a hot summer day. My life is so far removed from the reality that many in my community experience because of my white privilege. I left the Salvation Army that day with tears in my eyes, humility and appreciation in my heart for all those that serve in our community to lift the hands that hang down, and a commitment to do my part in our community to lift others up. I think I will be hitting the red buckets a little heavier this year.

                                                       

The Salvation Army is a great organization that provides medical/dental care, emergency housing, food, assistance with rent/utilities, social services, youth groups, addiction recovery, worship services, and more.

 https://centralusa.salvationarmy.org/northern/Rochester/

For my second cultural experience, I shopped at a Halal Market and ate at the adjoining Mediterranean restaurant. When I arrived at the market, the door was locked even though the sign said it should be open. I googled prayer times on my phone and found that prayer had just started. I waited in my car until prayer was over and thought about the times reserved for prayer each day. In a predominantly white community, we may be inconvenienced by a store or restaurant being closed for a few minutes throughout the day but in the greater Muslim world it is normal and accepted to pause and worship, committing to a culture and faith.

Once the store opened, I ventured in and found myself searching for anything familiar. Most of the items on the shelves were identifiable but their labels were a mystery to me. Even if I could identify a spice or grain, it didn’t mean that I would know how to use it. In the back of the store there was a small room with a TV, newspapers, and a couple tables and chairs. There were four men visiting and drinking coffee, tea, or something and discussing the news that was showing on TV. The market is located right across the street from the Mosque, and I wondered if the group of gentlemen gather often to visit and fellowship with one another.

 

I wandered around the store for several minutes and was hoping that a woman would walk in. There was a male proprietor who seemed very nice, but I felt nervous about asking him to help shop for groceries. I also I finally selected some items for purchase. I bought Tandoori bread, pomegranates, something that turned out to be like a cookie, and a new kind of tea to try. I consider myself a feminist and I have some assumptions about the role of women in Somalian or Arab cultures. I feel like women in these cultures must defer to the patriarch of the family and their voices are not often heard. I have been infuriated by the practice of honor killings and the pressure put on young women to not dishonor their family with inappropriate relationships or premarital sex. Whenever I have studied this issue there has been no discussion about young men dishonoring their families with their behavior. On the flipside I have great respect for people who live out their faith even when it sets them apart from the majority.

 

After looking at all kinds of food I had no confidence to cook, I went next door to the Mediterranean restaurant. The waitress was wearing hijab and that put me immediately at ease. For years, I have developed sweet friendships with women from Somalia and Yemen. I was intrigued and somewhat disappointed in myself when I noticed the different feelings I had toward the man in the market and the woman in the restaurant. I suppose that my comfort was likely from an assumption that I have more in common with a woman and assumed that I could build a relationship with the Somalian woman in the restaurant like I had done in the past. I suppose I need to push myself to learn more and interact with more men in the Somalian or Arab communities. 

https://youtu.be/LnJvHtEL6kk

I was determined to try something new and outside of my comfort zone. I settled on the lamb and beef sandwich. I have never had lamb, but the sandwich was delicious. I saw other things on the menu that I wanted but they were served more “family style” and that was too much food for me. I want to come back with friends and adventure a bit more. 

I am grateful for the experiences I have had on this assignment. I am also grateful for the new information I am gaining as I study. In the chapter regarding individuals and families of Arab descent, I am learning truths that will help me have more positive interactions with the Arab community. I am learning that Islam and most Arab cultures stress education for women and equality in relationships. It is apparently a more socio-political situation where women are denied education, rights, and a voice. With the religious respect I mentioned earlier, I am glad to know of the strength found at the mosque for this community and that involving an Imam in therapy could be helpful and appreciated. I am both humbled by all that I have yet to learn and excited about the journey.

 

2011-2012 Straight from the hose

I have been running faster than I have strength since school started. It is by no small miracle that I am able to dress and feed myself without breaking down in tears. Before any of you get to worried or pity me, I tell you I am actually running faster than I have strength and my Jesus sustains me.

I have spent many hours worrying and trying to discern which activities I should cut from my life, but I keep getting the impression that I need to focus on the task at hand and endure. I know that there will be some definite adjustments in the future but for now I worry about today. After all, doesn't the Lord tell us that there are worries enough for today without adding the stress of tomorrow.

I am grateful to be sustained by a wonderful family, but more importantly, I am carried by my Redeemer who seems to think that my best is good enough.

No Christmas Music

I haven't listened to much Christmas music at my house this season. I have tried to figure out why this is so and I have identified a few explanations:

1. I am not home very much.
2. When I am home (like now) I cannot escape two pianos and one flute being played.
3. When I am in my car I am either talking to passengers or enjoying the few minutes of silence it provides.

The Christmas music I HAVE heard has been from the Rochester Area Girls Choir rehearsals/concerts and the time I spend in the restroom at work. Let me explain. The office manager at school, God bless her, has placed a CD player in the staff ladies room. When nature calls, I head to the bathroom, sit down (I'm a girl after all), and listen to the lovely music playing. If I didn't have students waiting for me I would probably linger longer in the "music" room.

I have tried to fit more time in for my beautiful Christmas melodies to waft over me, but I think this year I will have to rely on my trips to the loo.

Running vs. LIFE

Well, as I ventured out on a morning run by myself I was enlightened by certain parallels between my running experiences and my life.

Flat and Straight = Sometimes a run seems simple. It's flat and you can see far enough ahead that you know exactly where you are going. Sometimes you can predict exactly how long it will take to get to the end of the straightaway. I find similarities between this type of run and my "coasting" times of life. There is minimal day-to-day type stresses (aches/pains) and things kind of keep rolling on. I begin to feel confident in my abilities and position in life.

Curves = Now curvy paths may be uphill, downhill, or flat. This type of running can be very emotional. You never quite know where you are going, exactly. You can't see far ahead in the path. You may hit a short downhill and feel respite, "This is going to be OK." Then you turn a corner and there is a daunting hill. I think that most of real living is curves. We rarely are able to see our path for any measurable distance before us. Each day is filled with surprises that throw a wrench into our well laid plans or bathe us in God's mercy.

Downhill = For all intents and purposes you would think the downhill would be a blessing to the runner. You are partly right. A short downhill can give you a chance to catch your breath, work a little less, and let your feet just fall one in front of the other. There is relief in a downhill run, initially. If a downhill run is too long it can be murder on your body. I learned many years ago that hiking up a hill is much easier on the body than coming back down. If our downhills in life are too long, each step can become excruciating and jarring causing you to wish you could just sit down and stay there forever.


Uphill = Ugh! The most overwhelming to me as a runner. My neighborhood has many hills. The worst hills are brutal because you can almost see the end from the beginning. When I start that first step up a hill I know I have a long way to go. It is too overwhelming. I have found the only way to get up our hills is to focus on one footfall at a time. If I keep my eyes up looking at the end of the hill I convince myself I will never get there. This hill will never end. I will never get relief. However, if I draw in and focus on putting one foot in front of the other, eventually I find myself at the top. At this point, I look back at the hill and thank the Lord for getting me through it. I hate hills, but they do show us how strong we really can be if we are "running with Jesus".

Humidity = Finally, since I am a Minnesotan I must address the humidity factor. Humidity can make the simplest task difficult or seem impossible. Even those blessed flat/straight areas become difficult because the air is so thick you have to slice it and chew it before you can inhale. Bodies need oxygen to function. So, when you find yourself running or living with a dew point of 81, slow down - WALK. Be gentle with yourself, hydrate with water, living water to keep yourself from passing out along the path.

God promises us he will never leave us. I love Isaiah 40:31 "They that wait (lean) upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they will mount up with wings as eagles. They shall RUN and NOT be WEARY, they shall WALK and NOT FAINT." You will notice that I refer to life as a run/walk not a race. We are not competing with anyone. We are simply trying to get through one day after another with the Lord by our side. Some days we will run and feel like champions. Some days we will walk and feel lucky to have made it a couple of feet. But, every day we will get up and move because we love our Father in Heaven, we know we are saved through the atonement of Jesus Christ and we want to be more like Him.

Where have I been?

Nowhere, really. I have found that spring is a neck-breaking catapult into summer. Just when I get hopeful about spring coming around the bend we are in the downhill slide to summer. I can't seem to get a hold of anything as time speeds up with choir tour, end of the year field trips, school programs, annual work trip with D, Memorial Day...

In March I envision myself crawling into a comfortable hammock-type apparatus. I know that I can survive the rest of the cruel Minnesota winter and I look fondly to the horizon of a far off summer. "There is still time" I tell myself. I enjoy the schedule of school, lessons, rehearsals, and church activities. Routine wraps me in a warm, predictable embrace all school year long. I snuggle into my proverbial hammock feeling as if predictability will be my companion for a good-long time.

Little do I know that my snuggly hammock is really a fully cocked catapult ready to let loose. And so it does. It lets loose and sends me hurtling through time until I land in a gelatinous puddle of fatigue and bewilderment in late June. I am not saying that March to June are unpleasant days; quite the contrary, I love the blossom of spring and the anticipation of warm days, late nights, and sleeping in. Oh I love to sleep! But my June puddling self can't seem to be present in any of the moments I have "flown" over. Not sure how to slow all that down and really suck the marrow from each day.

My oldest daughter B is well on her way to young womanhood and all the blessings that come with that transition. Her life seems to swirl around my head and I try to keep smiling as I know her time with me is fleeting. I love that child. She is the product of prayer, fasting, and faith. A joy to me she has always been. Even in times of struggle, my interactions with her convince me that I am truly alive and a mother. Is it possible to both dread and eagerly anticipate the future? I am so excited to know her as she journeys into adulthood, but my heart will always ache for the days of snuggles, milk mustaches, and story books together.

My middle child M is an amazement. She colors my world vivid. If not for her, my life would be black and white and often without a soundtrack. Her perspective has opened up new experiences for me and my appreciation of all creation. What a blessing she has been to all of us with her tender heart and sensibility. What will she be and more importantly, what will she wear?

My boy C is my little man. Muscle from head to toe and a heart of gooey caramel. He smothers me with kisses and wants to help and take care of all "his girls". He has an old spirit that seems to communicate easily with heaven. I often sneak up to listen at his door as he talks with God and tells him all of his thoughts. Tender and simple, he thanks God for making his life possible, for frogs and beautiful rocks. He asks that no one will ever be hurt. No one will ever have their house burn down or get sick from carbon monoxide poisoning. (latest obsession) Help us to love each other and for everyone to know God better.

So, where have I been? Right here. Not present in the blogosphere, maybe not even present enough in my every day, but still right here - hurtling through time trying to grab any little bit of joy as it flies by.

GRRRRRRRRR!

I have been sick for a week. Life has been busy and none of us have really been "on our game". Tonight was regroup time. Why hasn't the spirit been as abundant in our lives? Why has there been more contention at home? What can we do to increase the peace and joy in our lives? Well, we decided as a family that we are going to recommit to kinder words, softer voices, more thoughtful communication.

Every day we are given an infinite number of opportunities to really mess things up. With each breath we can offend, hurt, misstep, overstep, step in it, so many steps backward. Mercifully, God has also provided so many ways to repent and be healed. We can recommit, confess, renew and commune. We can bear witness of Him, testify of Him, fast to be like Him, take His word in us, bear His name, serve Him, pray to Him, and know Him more fully.

I praise the Holy One who saved me and my family from the pitfalls of our existence and gave us a way out of ANY place we find ourselves. I accept Christ's atonement as THE WAY, the way I choose to follow and I will live my life to shine God love on everyone I meet. I pray that I will be of use to the Master, especially in my little family.

I am putting my foot down on THE ROCK and saying to all who oppose Him to get out of THE WAY. I am sure of my foundation and I will build my mansion despite the storms that persist because I know that I have a COVERING of protection and mercy. My fear is swallowed up in MY CONQUERER and my life is a song composed by THE VIRTUOSO.

I am waxing. Not actually "waxing", but rambling on. This whole thing started with a return to kindness in our home. So we are memorizing Proverbs 15:1 "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Here is to more turning away and a lot less stirring!

Word for today

M proposed our scripture of the week at family home evening tonight. She said she had the verse that we needed and it was also one of Grandma's favorites as well. She proposed:

John 15:7
"If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.

Any questions? Let me know when the miracles happen in your life, because they are comin'. Our Father is so good to us, let us praise Him before the blessing because it is WAY more fun than worryin'.

Love ya'll